Screens and little ones: a calm, guilt-free guide

In 2019 the World Health Organization published guidelines on physical activity, sedentary behaviour and sleep for children under five. On screens, they are short and clear:

• Under 1 year: screen time is not recommended.
• 1 year: sedentary screen time, such as watching TV or videos or playing computer games, is not recommended.
• 2 to 4 years: no more than one hour a day of sedentary screen time, and less is better.

The same guidelines encourage reading and storytelling with a caregiver whenever a young child is sitting still. Think of the hour as a ceiling, not a target.

These guidelines cover children under five, so they give no number for five- and six-year-olds. The same spirit is a sensible guide, and your paediatrician can help you decide what suits your child.

Taking a screen away leaves a gap, and a bored toddler will fill it loudly. It works better to have something ready to put in its place:

• Instead of a video at breakfast: let your child help by counting idlis onto plates or stirring the batter.
• Instead of cartoons while you cook: a small ball of chapati dough of their own to roll, poke and shape beside you.
• Instead of a phone in the car: play I spy with colours, count red buses or sing the rhymes they know.
• Instead of a tablet at the clinic: a small pouch with a board book, a notepad and two chunky crayons.
• Instead of a show to wind down: the same short story every night. Repetition is comforting at this age.

Rules about places are easier to keep than rules about minutes, because nobody has to watch the clock. Two good places to start:

• Meal times. Without a screen, a meal becomes a time to taste, chat and notice when the tummy is full. A plate of dal and rice eaten slowly, with the family talking, teaches a lot.
• Bedrooms. Keep TVs, tablets and phones out of the room where your child sleeps, and switch screens off a while before bed so the evening can slow down.

Some screen time is part of modern family life. When it happens, a few habits make it gentler:

1. Choose slow, simple programmes with a real story over fast, noisy ones, and turn off autoplay.
2. Watch together when you can, and talk about it: “Why do you think the elephant looked sad?”
3. Agree on the end before you start, such as two episodes and then hand-washing for dinner, and give a five-minute warning.
4. Prefer the living-room TV to a phone held close to the face, so it stays a shared, visible activity.

In many homes, children spend long hours with grandparents or a nanny while parents work. Screens often appear because they are the easiest way through a long afternoon, not because anyone is careless. Talk it through kindly rather than handing over a list of rules:

• Explain the why, and share the WHO guidance in your own words.
• Ask for their ideas. Grandparents often know more rhymes, stories and games than any app.
• Leave easy options within reach: a basket of books, some play-dough, a ball.
• Agree on one or two rules everyone keeps, such as no screens at meals.

Many families see a video call with a grandparent who lives far away as different from cartoons, because the child is talking and listening to someone they love. That is your family's choice to make.

Little ones watch us far more closely than they watch any screen. If they see a parent scrolling at the dinner table, they learn that phones belong there. Try leaving your own phone in another room during meals and for the first hour after you come home.

When you do pick it up, say what you are doing: “I'm checking when Ajji's bus arrives.” It shows that a phone is a tool you use for a reason, then put down.

Bengaluru's rain can keep everyone indoors for hours. Keep this list on the fridge:

1. Paper boats. Fold them together, then float them in a bucket of water. Stay right beside your child; even a little water needs an adult close by.
2. Kitchen band. Steel plates, wooden spoons and a shaker made from a small box of rice, taped firmly shut. March and sing.
3. Painting. Spread old newspaper on the floor and paint with fingers or a thick brush, using washable, child-safe paints.
4. Bedsheet fort. Drape a sheet over two chairs to make a cave for reading by torchlight.
5. Rain watching. Sit by the window, race the drops down the glass and name the sounds you hear.
6. Animal yoga. Be a cat, a cobra, then a tree, holding each pose for three slow breaths.

Keep small things such as beads and dry beans away from under-threes, as they can cause choking. Keep button batteries well out of reach of all young children: the NHS warns they can cause severe internal burns if swallowed.

Some days will have more screen time than you planned: a fever, a work deadline, a long journey. That is normal. What matters is the pattern across weeks, not one hard afternoon. Pick one change from this list, try it for a week, and add another when it feels easy.

At Crossmaze, our Montessori-based approach is built on visual, practical, hands-on learning, because children under five learn best by seeing and doing. The same is true at home: a lump of dough, a stack of blocks and a grown-up who joins in go a long way.